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Ironic Times

 NO. 1023 “Expect the Ironic” MAY 11 - 17, 2020 

May 4
May 18
FED CHAIR: WORST ECONOMY IN HISTORY
Trump: “Only I can fix it.”
 
WORLD NEWS
Chinese Doctors Say Virus Can
Be Transmitted Through Sex

Large-scale volunteer trials quickly commence.
 
ENVIRONMENT
Last Month Tied for
Warmest April on Record

Also cruelest April on record.
 
ALSO IN THE NEWS ...
Trump Tours Mask Factory to Guns N' Roses' “Live and Let Die”
It's also name of administration's pandemic strategy.
U. S. NEWS
Study: Death Toll Would Have
Been Halved Had President
Acted 4 Days Sooner

Sadly, he was distracted by something he saw on TV.
Pence “Not Worried” as
Coronavirus Infects His
Press Secretary

Tells reporters, “we've got plenty of bleach.”
 
REMINDER
  History is written by a bunch of losers.
 
Intel Agencies Conclude:
Virus Not Man-Made

However, botched response is.
Labor Dept. Issues Worst Jobs
Report in Nation's History

“Trump haters,” Trump tweets.
Bezos on Track to Be
First Trillionaire

According to his billionaire assistant.
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