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Ironic Times

 NO. 990 “Expect the Ironic” SEPTEMBER 23 - 29, 2019 

Sep 16
Sep 30
 
TRUMP TO SKIP UN CLIMATE SUMMIT
“I saw the weather report,” he says.
 
WORLD NEWS
North Korea Happy to See
Bolton Go, Once Called Him “Defective Human Product”

Kim urges Trump to throw him in his wood chipper.
Trump Administration Says
Migrants Passing Through
El Salvador Must Seek Asylum
There Before Asking U.S.

Either that or “bring him the broomstick of the Wicked Witch of the West.”
 
POLITICS
Just 2 in 5 Americans Can
Name Their Representative
In Congress

But they all plan to vote for his or her reelection.
U. S. NEWS
EPA Scales Back Water Protections
Public advised not to use water, keep it well away from children.
Three Mile Island, Site of 1979
Nuclear Meltdown, Shuts
Down for Good

Site to be re-purposed for low-income housing after ten thousand years.
 
REMINDER
  Whistleblow while you work.
 
Far Fewer Than Expected Show
Up for “Storm Area 51” Event

And no one who was there can remember anything.
 
ALSO IN THE NEWS ...
KFC Offering Fried Chicken on Glazed Doughnut, But for Limited Time Only
Offer expires when you do.
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