 FERDINAND “BONGBONG”
MARCOS, JR WINS PHILIPPINE ELECTION
He's nicknamed Bongbong because
he's “crazy, nuts, insane,”
explains supporter. |
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| WORLD NEWS |
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Finland, Sweden Want
to Join NATO
Want those cool NATO uniforms,
berets, nuclear-armed subs. |
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Apple Overtaken by Saudi
Oil Giant as World's Most Valuable Company
Change forces Apple to spend $300
million to remove “World's Most Valuable
Company” from all its signage and stationery. |
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| ALSO IN THE NEWS ... |
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 White House Warns
of Baby Formula Shortage
“Babies will just have to tighten their belts.” |
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| U. S. NEWS |
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Jan 6 Committee Subpoenas
McCarthy, Other GOP Lawmakers
McCarthy, GOP lawmakers say
they'll subpoena Jan 6 committee
immediately after midterms. |
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Congress Will Hold First Open
Hearing on UFOs in 50 Years
Pushing aside hearings on child care,
domestic terrorism, income inequality,
education, and climate. |
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| REMINDER |
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Special military operation is Hell. |
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Feds Investigating Trump About
Mishandling Top Secret Documents
Want to know why diagrams for Navy's
Trident missile turned up in magazine
rack at Mar-a-Lago tanning salon. |
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| LAW |
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Louisiana Advances Bill
Classifying Abortion as Homicide
Rider requires wives to stay in kitchen, barefoot. |
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