| OBAMA WILL SOON
HAVE ABILITY TO ISSUE SECURITY ALERTS
TO EVERY CELLPHONE |
| Expansion of Presidential
power authorized by Executive Tweet. |
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| WORLD NEWS |
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Three Bin Laden Widows Interviewed
By “Dancing With the Stars.” |
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Demjanjuk Convicted of Nazi
War Crimes, Then Freed Due to His Age
And a promise not to do it again. |
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| ALSO IN THE NEWS . . . |
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 Marijuana
Crop Found Near Bin Laden's
Compound
Explains three tons of Nestle's
Crunch bars discovered in
basement. |
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| U. S. NEWS |
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Oil Industry Execs Defend
Billions in Tax Breaks
“We have to eat,” says one. |
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Gates: By Year’s End
We’ll Have Turned the Corner in
Afghanistan
After which we'll see the light at the end of the tunnel. |
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| REMINDER |
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What
you don't know won't hurt
you, but really helps
advertisers. |
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U.S. Commandos Discover Stash of
Porn in Osama’s Hideout
White House announces porn will only be
shown to select members of Congress. |
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Arizona Senate President
Claims He Was in Compliance With Law
About Gifts from Fiesta Bowl
Although he's still not sure about the
strip club, hookers. |
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| POLITICS |
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Romney Blasts New Health Care
Law
Says Obama stole it from him. |
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