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Ironic Times

 NO. 589 “Expect the Ironic” DEC 26, 2011 - JAN 1, 2012 

Dec 19
Jan 2
NORTH KOREANS STILL GRIEF-STRICKEN OVER DEATH OF KIM JONG-IL
Urged to report any neighbors not grief-stricken.
 
WORLD NEWS
Reuters: 2011 “Year of the Tyrant”
2012 expected to be “Year of the Guy Who Overthrew the Tyrant.”
Poll: France Gloomiest Nation
Disneyland Paris rated “Gloomiest Place on Earth.”
 
U. S. NEWS
FBI: Violent Crime Down in 2011
While white collar crime went through the roof.
Jobless Claim Drop Signals
Economic Momentum

They're hiring again at soup kitchens.
 
ALSO IN THE NEWS . . .
George H.W. Bush Says Romney is “Best Choice"
From a “pathetic field of losers.”
(Last week we brought together a distinguished panel of psychics, prophets and prognosticators and asked them for their predictions for the comimg year.
Kandu: “Obama will be reelected, defeating Pawlenty, a last-minute replacement for Romney after Romney's six other families surface.”
Madame Blavinsky: “The economy will roar back, unemployment will drop to zero and there will be a chicken in every pot — in Cuba.”
Miss Cleo: “The first commercial space flight will safely transport a billionaire and two blonde companions into a romantic low-earth orbit.”
Cassandra: “The Kardashians will join with Noam Chomsky to celebrate Juxtaposition Day.”
Watson (computer): “The world will end on Dec. 21.”
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