Ironic Times

 NO. 224 "Expect the Ironic" DEC 27, 2004 - JAN 2, 2005  

Dec 20
Jan 3
IRONIC TIMES MAN OF THE YEAR
  Donald H. Rumsfeld
From his deft handling of the "cakewalk" in Iraq to his sensitive and reassuring meetings with troops headed there, no one quite encapsulated the heady and exultant success of our liberation of the Iraqi people better than the man who was its prime architect, the wise and witty Secretary of Defense, Donald H. Rumsfeld, our Man of the Year for 2004.
 
WORLD NEWS
Ukrainians Turn Out in Large
Numbers for Revote

Many drawn to polls by offer of free soup.
Survey: Most Europeans Hate Americans
But majority would become ignorant, arrogant, complacent international bullies like us if they could.
 
ALSO IN THE NEWS . . .
Conservative Group Mounts Campaign to Kick United Nations Out of U.S.
Would replace New York headquarters (shown) with an IHOP.
U. S. NEWS
Stock Market Hits 3-Year High
Poor holiday sales, exploding deficit, sinking dollar, endless quagmire in Iraq all combine to fuel rally.
Bush Removes Protections From National Forests
But adds protections to National Cement Refuge.
Texas Woman Pays $50,000
For Clone of Dead Cat

Hopes to rid house of cloned mice.
 
Bush Reveals Four-Step Plan for Working With New Senate
1.  Sit.
2.  Stay. 
3.  Roll over.
4.  Confirm all previously rejected judges.
 
YEAR IN REVIEW - 2004
2004’s Hottest Trends: Blogs, Cellphones
2004's coldest trends: conversation, personal interaction.
Rich-Poor Gap Widens
Greatest disparity since Paleolithic Era, say experts.
 
MEDIA
Scott Peterson Trial Year's Top Story
War in Iraq, presidential election next.
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