 UN REPORTS RISE
IN OPIUM POPPY PRODUCTION IN AFGHANISTAN
Things finally looking up for beleaguered country. |
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| WORLD NEWS |
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Greece Agrees to Cut 15,000 More Civil
Service Jobs to Get $15 Billion More
Bailout Funds from IMF, Europe
Money needed to pay for recent flood of unemployed. |
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| PICTURE OF THE WEEK |
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Former
President Bush “Doing Fine,”
Say Doctors
However “he thinks he's died and
gone to heaven.” |
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| U. S. NEWS |
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Senate Blocks Background
Checks for Gun Buyers
Keeps them for voters. |
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Boy Scouts Will Consider
Allowing Gay Scouts
Just as long as they're not atheists. |
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| REMINDER |
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If it says, “extremely important,
action required” or “urgent, open
immediately,” just toss it. |
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Foreign Students Balk at Coming
To U.S., Fearing Country
Full of Lunatics Armed With
Automatic Weapons
Fortunately, country also full of lunatics
armed with automatic weapons to protect us. |
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| POLLS |
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Public Pessimism About
Economy Rising
Majority waiting on line for free day-old bread
see hard times ahead. |
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