Ironic Times

NO. 32 "Expect the Ironic" APRIL 23 - 29, 2001

Apr 16
Apr 30
SPRING BREAK: TIME FOR CONTEMPLATION, REFLECTION
Students contemplate tans, reflectors.
WORLD NEWS
Israel: Just "Sightseeing" in Gaza
A little shopping, some target practice, that's all.
U.S. Military No Longer Planning to Fight Two-Front War
Will only protect New York, D.C., cede California to the enemy.
 
ALSO IN THE NEWS . . .
JEB BUSH VISITS D.C. TO LOBBY BROTHER
Hoping to get Happy Hour expanded to two hours.
U. S. NEWS
IRS Cuts Back Sharply on Audits
At least, that's what they want you to think
Standards For Air, Water Relaxed
Standards for dress, behavior tightened.
"West Wing" Creator
Busted for Drugs

Quickly pardoned by Martin Sheen.
 
REMINDER
Never trust anyone over 65.
 
ENVIRONMENT
EPA Gets Tough on Lead Emissions
Industry must report anything over 100 lbs., occasionally say they are sorry.
 
FRINGE
“All of Our Representatives are Assisting Other Customers”
May Be Cover-Up

Investigators discover "representatives" are asleep, doing drugs, having sex.
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