| |
 HAPPY DAYS ARE
HERE AGAIN!
Bush magically comes up with one
trillion dollars from somewhere. |
|
| |
| WORLD NEWS |
 |
Pakistan Troops Ordered to Fire on U.S.
Troops Who Attack Across Border
U.S. troops ordered to attack across
border if fired upon. |
|
Russia to Help Cuba Build
Space Center
Cuba hopes to put man on moon by 3008. |
| |
| PICTURE OF THE
WEEK |
|
 Guinness
Trots Out Record Holders to
Promote Latest Book
Shown: woman who speaks 133
languages with man who memorized
pi to 240,000 places. |
|
|
| U. S. NEWS |
|
Bush Administration
Acknowledges Economy a “Mixed
Picture”
Points to positive signs in panhandling
sector. |
|
Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco
And Firearms Reports Losing
Dozens of Firearms
Alcohol blamed |
| |
| REMINDER |
| |
It's
10 PM: Do you know where
your bank is? |
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| |
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Mississippi Fattest State,
Colorado Thinnest
Alaska dumbest. |
|
FDA Considers Relaxing Rule
on Engineered Animals for Consumption
Public could soon be eating centaur a la
king. |
| |
| ALSO IN THE NEWS . . . |
|
Capitalism
Collapses
“Didn't work,” says expert. |
|
