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HAPPY DAYS ARE
HERE AGAIN!
Bush magically comes up with one
trillion dollars from somewhere. |
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WORLD NEWS |
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Pakistan Troops Ordered to Fire on U.S.
Troops Who Attack Across Border
U.S. troops ordered to attack across
border if fired upon. |
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Russia to Help Cuba Build
Space Center
Cuba hopes to put man on moon by 3008. |
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PICTURE OF THE
WEEK |
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Guinness
Trots Out Record Holders to
Promote Latest Book
Shown: woman who speaks 133
languages with man who memorized
pi to 240,000 places. |
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U. S. NEWS |
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Bush Administration
Acknowledges Economy a “Mixed
Picture”
Points to positive signs in panhandling
sector. |
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Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco
And Firearms Reports Losing
Dozens of Firearms
Alcohol blamed |
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REMINDER |
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It's
10 PM: Do you know where
your bank is? |
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Mississippi Fattest State,
Colorado Thinnest
Alaska dumbest. |
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FDA Considers Relaxing Rule
on Engineered Animals for Consumption
Public could soon be eating centaur a la
king. |
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ALSO IN THE NEWS . . . |
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Capitalism
Collapses
“Didn't work,” says expert. |
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