BUSH SURPRISED TO LEARN
OF HIGH GAS PRICES
“When I was elected eight
years ago it was only a buck!” |
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| WORLD NEWS |
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New York Philharmonic Visits
North Korea
Venerable orchestra performs for country's
elite, then sent to slave labor camp,
their instruments recycled for raw
materials. |
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Fidel: Medvedev in Charge
Putin: Raul in charge. |
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| FACTOID |
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Report: 1 in 100 American
Adults in Jail
Everyone else under house arrest. |
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| ALSO IN THE NEWS . . . |
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 Heightened
Air Security Bans Clothes,
Luggage, Carry-Ons
Airlines report few complaints. |
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| U. S. NEWS |
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Consumers Cutting Back on
Food, Clothing, Health Care
Everything but cable. |
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Pentagon: When Surge Ends,
There Will Be 8,000 More
U.S. Troops Than Before
After all have been withdrawn, there will
be 50,000 left. |
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| REMINDER |
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Sometimes
you have to go over to
the dark side. |
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Bush: We're Not in Recession
Cites strong yacht sales. |
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ACLU: FBI Lists Over 900,000
as Known or Suspected Terrorists
Including every member of ACLU. |
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GAO Investigators Travel to
Cayman Islands to Track
Offshore Tax Evaders
“We'll get to the bottom of this if we have
to drink a thousand banana daiquiris,” says
one. |
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Mukasey Pays Surprise Visit to
Guantanamo
Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition. |
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