Ironic Times

 NO. 259 "Expect the Ironic" AUG 29 - SEPT 4, 2005 

Aug 22
Sept 5
 
BUSH: NO PLANS FOR EARLY PULLOUT
From Crawford.
WORLD NEWS
Iraqis Make Major Progress in
Writing Constitution

Kurds, Shiites, Sunnis agree on alternate side of the street parking regulations.
U.S. Sending More Personnel to
Iraq in Advance of October Election

Most were Republican poll workers in Ohio.
Chavez Proposes Selling Cheap
Gas to Poor Communities in U.S.

Dick Cheney calls for his assassination.
 
RELIGION
Least Church-Going Countries
Give Most to Poor Countries

God knows why.
 
MISCELLANEOUS
Human Exhibit Opens at London Zoo
Already two have mated, to the delight of zookeepers.
U. S. NEWS
Feds Warn of Terrorists Disguising Themselves as Homeless People
Urge public not to give them any money.
Base-Closing Commission
Rejects Pentagon Plan to
Close Two Navy Bases

Connecticut base will continue to build
submarines, Maine shipyard will continue to dismantle them, sell metal for scrap.
 
REMINDER
  We're fighting them over there so we
  can win elections over here.
 
Soaring Gas Prices Force More
Americans to Walk, Bike, Use
Public Transportation

“It's horrible, horrible,” says one.
Pentagon Adds Slogans to
Troops' Gravestones

Some find recruitment pitches in bad taste.
 
 
FRONT PAGE
PAGE TWO
PAGE THREE
ARCHIVE
CONTACT
STORE

   Copyright 2005 Ironic Times