Ironic Times

NO. 7 "Expect the Ironic" OCT. 30 - NOV. 5, 2000

Oct 23
Nov 6
WORLD NEWS
Secretary of State Albright to
Stay in North Korea
Loves weather, food, "cute little shops" in Pyongyang.
Pope Condemns High Price
of Gasoline

Gas-guzzling popemobile gets less than eight miles per gallon.
Pickpockets, Purse-Snatchers on
Strike in France
Demanding paid vacations, health benefits.
Supermodels Donate Leftovers
to Fight World Hunger

Move could help "considerably" to combat starvation in third world.
 
ENVIRONMENT
Mexico City Sitting Under Thick Cloud
of Noxious, Gut-Choking Smog
Best conditions in forty years.
 
U. S. NEWS
 
BILL GATES HAS TEMPER TANTRUM OVER WINDOWS SOURCE CODE THEFT
"I want it back! I want it back! I want it back!" he screamed at the top of his lungs, before returning to his 630-room house.
Congress Passes Pharaoh's
Rights Bill
Wealthy may have up to ten servants entombed with them to use in afterlife.
Census: Big Population Shift
to the Southeast

Public asked to move a little bit to the northwest.
Statehood for Wyoming Proposed
"But we are a state," says Governor.
 
ELECTION 2000
"Gore Good, Bush Bad" Campaign Targets Less Thoughtful Voters
GOP response: "Bush Better."
In Case of Dead Heat, Clinton
Will Remain in Office
Announcement made by League of Young Women Voters.
 
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