| PEOPLE |
 |
 Musk, World's Richest Man,
$115 Billion Richer Since Inauguration
Trump told him to go into Fort
Knox and “take what you want.” |
|
| |
| PUBLISHING |
|
Simon & Schuster to End
Tradition of Book Blurbs
“A stunningly bad idea!”
— Kirkus Book Reviews. |
| |
| BUSINESS |
|
Report: NewYork Stock
Exchange Considering
22-HourTrading Day
With no working from home. |
|
Trump Promised to Bring
Down Price of Eggs, But
They're Up 14%
White House issues statement placing
blame squarely on “the chickens.” |
|
Corporate Profits Near
All-Time Highs, Wages
Near All-Time Lows
“Ideal conditions,” says
Trump, also Marx. |
|
| SCIENCE |
|
 Small Chance
Building-Sized Asteroid Will Hit Earth in 2032
Trump assigns Sylvester Stallone,
Mel Gibson and Jon Voigt to "go
up there and blow it up ASAP!" |
|
| |
| HEALTH / MEDICINE |
|
 Study: Our
Brains May Contain as Much
Plastic as Five Paper Clips
Handy to know when you're fumbling
around with a bunch of loose documents. |
|
| |
| CORRECTION |
| |
 Last week, in an article about
Darren Beattie, newly appointed State Dept.
Under Secretary, we accompanied his quote
“Competent white men must be in charge
if you want things to work” with a picture
of Laurel and Hardy. It should have been The
Three Stooges. We apologize for any confusion. |
|
|
