| PEOPLE |
 |
 Sen. Thune: Americans
Need AR-15s to Shoot Prairie Dogs
“You've got to eat,” he explains. |
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| BUSINESS |
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Inflation Rising at Fastest
Rate Since 1981
A quart of milk, a dozen eggs,
two pounds of ground beef and
a gallon of chocolate mint chip
ice cream cost more now than
they did when you started
reading this sentence. |
|
 Study: NFTs Quickly Lose Value
as Collectors Get Bored
And finally figure out what
“non-fungible” means. |
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| ADVERTISING |
|
 Burger King in
Austria Celebrates Gay Pride
Month by Offering Burgers With
Two Top Buns or Two Bottom Buns
Paris Burger Kings celebrate Menage
a Trois Week with two top and one
bottom bun. |
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| SCIENCE |
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NASA Joins Hunt for UFOs
All new astronauts will learn to speak Vulcan. |
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Report: Quantum Computers
Could Create Completely New
Forms of Matter
Like Play-Doh, Green Slime, Silly Putty. |
|
 Similarly Designed Tools
Found Thousands of Miles Apart Proves
Ancient Humans Shared Knowledge
Or, they bought their tools from
the same cave-to-cave salesman. |
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| ENVIRONMENT |
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Microplastics Found in Fish
Giving hope someday of recyclable fish. |
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| HEALTH / MEDICINE |
|
 Robots Employed
to Help Deal With Loneliness Epidemic
They've been adjusted so they don't win
at chess every time. |
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