| PEOPLE |
 |
 Bill and Melinda
Gates Finalize One of Largest
Divorces in History
As stated in prenup, she gets all
the proceeds from Clippy, he gets
what's left. |
|
| |
| POLL |
|
1 in 3 Florida Pandemic
Pet Owners Experiencing
Buyers Remorse
Hundreds of tigers, pythons,
kangaroos looking for new homes. |
| |
| BUSINESS |
|
Elon Musk Criticized for Plans
To Put Billboard in Space
Giant sign reading “Your Product
Here” will be placed in orbit
sometime before start of holiday
shopping season. |
| |
| CORRECTION |
| |
 Last week, we described this
photograph as the sudden exodus
of American personnel from
Afghanistan. We were in error.
It is in fact a photograph of
the sudden exodus of American
personnel from Vietnam. Or
Iraq. We apologize for any
confusion. |
|
|
| SCIENCE |
|
Study: Movies Like Jaws
Hinder Efforts to Save
Endangered Shark Species
Cites paucity of dinosaurs since
Jurassic Park came out. |
|
Artificial Intelligence May
Help Cars Detect Potholes
Before You Hit Them
An audio warning, “Pothole in half a
second!” could save some lives. |
|
 Mile-Wide
Asteroid Might Hit Earth in 2182
To be safe, experts say we should
assemble a crew of grizzled
character actors, plus an
ex-football player or two, and
send them up there to blow the
damn thing up. |
|
| |
| HEALTH / MEDICINE |
|
Study: Pandemic Has Led to
More Violent Protests, Greater
Distrust in Government
And sharp increase in binge-watching. |
|
Study: Roller Coasters Could
Help Fight Migraines
When combined with a daily regimen
of tilt-a-whirl and bumper cars. |
|
