| PEOPLE |
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 2-Year-Old
From California Becomes
Youngest American Mensa Member
She's cute, bubbly, and has already amassed
a fortune in cryptocurrency.
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| BUSINESS |
|
CEO Median Pay Reached All-Time
High of $12.7 Million During Pandemic
Not including stimulus checks. |
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ExxonMobil Shareholders Elect
Two Climate Activists to Its Board
Boardroom thermostat reset to 78 degrees. |
|
 Amazon Rolls
Out Private Kiosks for
Overwhelmed Employees to
“Focus on Their Emotional
Well-Being”
A place for them to relax, take a
deep breath, empty their
bottle of urine. |
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| REAL ESTATE |
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New York to Build Homeless
Shelter on “Billionaire's Row”
in Midtown Manhattan
Anticipating another crash. |
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| TECHNOLOGY |
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Microsoft President: Orwell's
1984 Could Happen in 2024
“And we hope to provide the technology
to make it all possible.” |
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| SCIENCE |
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New Research: Maximum Human Life
Span Approximately 150 Years
That reverse mortgage is starting to look
pretty good. |
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| HEALTH / MEDICINE |
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Study: Colorful Pills Work
Better as a Placebo Than White
But ask your doctor first. |
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Researchers: Memories Fade as
We Age, Only Basic Details Remain
For example, we can remember there was
some kind of ruckus at the Capitol in
January, but we can't remember what
it was about or who was behind it. |
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Average Human Temperature
Now 97.5, No Longer 98.6
So, wear a sweater. |
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| ENVIRONMENT |
 |
 Biden Pledges
to Slash Greenhouse Gas
Emissions in Half by 2030
“Same for malarkey,” he adds. |
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