Ironic Times

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PAGE THREE – DECEMBER 17 - 23, 2018
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CONSUMER NEWS
Newest Pet Cameras Allow You to Observe, Chat, Dispense Treats
Larger models for larger pets, and the elderly.
 
POLL
52% of Public Sees Glass
Half-Empty, 36% Half-Full

Remaining 12% see lipstick on glass, send it back.
 
LAW
Trump Wants Courts to Determine
if it's Legal for Saturday Night Live
to “Belittle” Him

When he's not the host.
 
CORRECTION
 
 
Last week this photograph of a newly discovered pre-human ancestor was mistakenly included in our coverage of President George H.W. Bush's State Funeral. We regret the error.
FEATURE
Who has gone to jail for refusing a subpoena to testify in front of a grand jury?
A )Members of the Mafia.
B )Barry Bonds' trainer.
C )The President of the United States.
Hint: Maybe not yet, but be patient.
 
RELIGION
Pope Expels Cardinal Accused of Sexually Abusing Minors from Advisory Council
“The Church no longer needs advice in these matters,” he explains.
 
ODDS 'N' ENDS
Scandal-Ridden Interior Secretary Zinke Leaving
Among his transgressions: shooting and stuffing Smokey Bear.

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