| LEISURE |
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 Madden 15 Glitch Renders Browns
Linebacker Christian Kirksey as
One-Foot Tall
Although he's trampled on every play,
he's good at sneaking unnoticed
into opponent's huddle. |
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| SPORTS |
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Baseball Ratings Decline Blamed on
Video Replay, Lower Strike Zone, Puny
Post-Steroid Era Hitting, Longer Games
And the infield fly rule. |
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Fans Don’t Like Cutting Down Violence
in the NFL
But could be just the break the National
Badminton League has been waiting for. |
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 Struggling for
Attendance, South Korean Baseball Team Adds
Robot Fans
Who repeatedly chant “kill the ump!”
in unison. |
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| NEW PRODUCTS |
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 It's a Robot - It's a
Couch - It's a Robocouch!
Created by Australian engineering students,
Robocouch looks to be the final nail in the
coffin of Western Civilization, and a great
way to get a beer without leaving the comfort
of your man cave. $2802 (when available),
at Sofas for Loafers. |
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| TRAVEL |
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3 Flights Diverted in 9 Days,
2 More Last Week, by Passenger
Fights Over Legroom
But for an additional $50, you can get a full refund
if your flight is diverted due to a legroom fight. |
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| ODDS 'N' ENDS |
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Karl Lagerfeld
Barbie Doll Unveiled
First entry in Mattel's “Decadence” line. |
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