| NEW PRODUCTS |
 |
 Dumbbell
Utensils Help You Lose Weight!
The more you eat, the trimmer you get; the
trimmer you get, the hungrier you get; the
hungrier you get, the more you eat. $49.95,
at Dumb Ideas. |
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| MISCELLANEOUS |
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Inherited Comic Book Collection Expected
to Fetch $2 Million at Auction
Not as good as your collection, which your
mother threw in the garbage when you went
to college. |
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| POLL |
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Seven in Ten Americans Believe
Devil is Real
Evenly split on whether he's Democrat or
Republican. |
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| KIDZ KORNER |
| Vocabulary
Builders |
| European Union n.pl A
confederation of all sovereign nations of Europe,
who pledge to treat each other with respect,
except for Greece. |
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| It's been reported that 25%
of all super PAC money has come from just five
donors. Who are they? |
| A ) | The starting
five of the Miami Heat |
| B ) | The Dionne
quintuplets |
| C ) | The Five
Blind Boys of Alabama |
| D ) | Bob Perry,
Sheldon Adelson and Miriam Adelson, Harold Simmons,
Peter Thiel |
| Hint: Two of the five are married to each other. |
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| LIFESTYLE |
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Indiana Lawmaker: Girl Scouts
Out to Destroy American Values
Calls for all Brownies to be sterilized. |
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| PICTURE OF THE WEEK |
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Snafu at G20
Meeting of Foreign Ministers
Apparently a lot of people didn't get the memo
to wear green. |
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