| NEW PRODUCTS |
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Anti-Flatulence
Underpants Reach Store
Shelves
Look for them in the
“Highly
Embarrassing” aisle. |
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| |
| CONSUMER NEWS |
|
Consumer Reports Retracts
Flawed Car Seat Test Results
Parents advised to strap infants to luggage
rack until further tests can be conducted. |
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| SPORTS |
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Super Bowl Prediction: Postponed
Due to Inclement Weather
Rare blizzard dumps three feet of snow on
Miami, forcing NFL officials to
reschedule game for Feb. 11, in sunny
Cleveland. |
| |
| KIDZ KORNER |
Vocabulary
Builders
win
vi. to not lose,
to not fail, as in,
“We must ~ in
Iraq.” archaic: to
gain a victory in a
contest, to succeed. |
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|
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| POLLS |
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30% Satisfied With State of Nation
Cite “progress of war,” among other reasons. |
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| PUBLISHING |
|
Novel Written Entirely in
Text Messages Published in Finland
“lol,” says one reviewer. |
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| LAW |
|
New Bill Would Allow Dogs in Bars
But they must be over 21. |
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| ALSO IN THE NEWS . . . |
|
Air Force
Reports Seeing UFO's Over
Several Southeastern States
Civilians pooh-pooh claim, say they were
weather balloons. |
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