Ironic Times

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PAGE THREE – MARCH 20 - 26, 2006
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LIFESTYLE
Euro Proving More Popular Than Dollar
Shown: 300 Euro note, worth about $360.
McMansions Getting Bigger
Some have their own McDonald's.
 
ODDS 'N' ENDS
Study: Most Lottery Winners
End Up Broke, Suicidal

Lucky players never win.
Report: Military Developing
Insect Cyborgs

Should soon be available to public.
 
SPORTS
Basketball: One Of China's Top Women Players Coming to U.S.
Chen Lu (left), sharp-shooting guard, signs with L.A.'s Sparks (woman at right unidentified).
FEATURE
A Federal Appeals Court has dealt the White House a devastating blow by ruling that the Environmental Protection Agency:
A )cannot overrule lax state laws which violate the Clean Air Act, substituting strict federal standards which protect the environment.
B )cannot overrule strict state laws which protect the environment, substituting lax federal standards which violate the Clean Air Act.
Hint: Don't get hung up on the name, "Environmental Protection Agency."

The Bush Administration has spent $440 billion on the wars in Afghanistan and Iraq and is getting ready to spend more this year than last year because:
A )We can see the light at the end of the tunnel.
B )We've done such a heckuva job over there we just need to spend a few hundred billion more.
C )They love us so much for what we've done already, there's no telling how much they'll love us if we stay longer.
Hint: You must choose one of the above answers, or you're with the terrorists.

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