Ironic Times

 NO. 217 "Expect the Ironic" NOVEMBER 8 - 14, 2004 

Nov 3
Nov 15
U. S. NEWS
  CABINET SHUFFLE LIKELY
IN BUSH 2ND TERM

Several expected to depart (top row), replacements rumored (bottom row).
 
OUT OUT OUT
J. Ashcroft C. Powell T. Ridge
IN IN IN
M. Racicot C. Rice P. Wolfowitz
 
Americans Place Moral, Spiritual Values Over Material Gain
Many vote against their own economic
interest to deny others civil rights.
Final Analysis: Youth Vote Didn't Materialize for Kerry
Most were attending “get out the vote” concerts.
 
ALSO IN THE NEWS . . .
Website Offers Disappointed Democrats a Mate in Canada
Millions plan to move, begin new relationship, get free health coverage, cheap Viagra, smoke marijuana legally.

My fellow Americans, now that the recent demonstration of our universally admired and respected democratic process has reached its final and conclusive culmination, let me just say, simply, that I pledge and promise to do all and everything I can to help restore, return, and bring back to the public discourse, as well as the community conversation, a sense, or at least an impression of, civility, courtesy, cordiality and, most of all, brevity. Thank you.

(Sen. Kerry's remarks were edited for reasons of space.)
 
WORLD NEWS
UN Study: Global Population to Stabilize at 9 Billion by 2300
War, global warming, meteor impacts, volcanoes, alien invasions will limit growth.
Karzai Declared Winner in Afghanistan
Reaches out to murderous warlords who opposed him.
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