| TECHNOLOGY |
 |
 Emo Robot
Anticipates, Mimics Human Facial Expressions
“We're aiming at the billion-dollar
mirror market,” says creator. |
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|
 Most Accurate
Clock Ever Can Operate for 40
Billion Years Without Error
It'll still keep accurate time
long after the universe is gone. |
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| EDUCATION |
|
New Alabama Law Bans Funding
for Diversity, Equity, Inclusion
in Public Schools
Will use savings to fund conformity,
inequality, exclusion. |
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| SPORTS |
|
 Paris Waiters
Race Provides Olympics Preview
Visitors can expect historically bad table service. |
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| FEATURE |
 |
| How much, according
to The New York Times, has former President
Trump spent on legal bills since
leaving office in 2021? |
| |
A ) |
$5 million. |
| |
B ) |
$10 million. |
| |
C ) |
$15 million. |
| |
D ) |
More then $100 million. |
| Hint: all of it in small donations
from little old ladies in Dubuque. |
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| ODDS 'N' ENDS |
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 |
| |
Total Solar Eclipse to Sweep
Across Country
Over forty million in its path
will be forced out of their
homes, left to forage for food,
water, shelter in cold,
pitch-black wilderness. |
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