Ironic Times

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PAGE TWO – APRIL 24 - 30, 2023
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PEOPLE
Weisselberg Released From Prison After Serving Four Months
Concerned friends say he looks “very buff.”
 
POLITICS
New Bipartisan PAC Goes
After Extreme Far Right
Members of Congress

Targeting Marjorie Taylor Greene, Lauren Boebert, Paul Gosar et al, it's registered as The Low Hanging Fruit Political Action Committee.
Biden Running for Re-Election
“Maybe I will, too,” says Dianne Feinstein.
 
BUSINESS
CEO Tells Employees Upset
About Not Getting Bonuses
to “Leave Pity City”

Suggests they “go to Discount City.”
Fox, Dominion Settle for $787.5 Million, But No On-Air Apology
“That'll pay for a lot of crooked voting machines,” cracks Fox News host Lou Dobbs.
SCIENCE
Pentagon: No ”Credible
Evidence” of Alien Activity

Just a lot of stuff ”you can't make up.”
 
Report: Sealife Adapting to Great Pacific Garbage Patch
Fish frolicking amidst a floating island of plastic waste suggests at least one future cartoon show featuring these adorable creatures.
 
HEALTH / MEDICINE
If You're Wondering What
Became of Monkeypox, It is
Now Referred to as MPX

Zoos complained that old name was “killing attendance.”
 
MISCELANEOUS
Report: King Charles's Net Worth Estimated at $2.2 Billion
Includes jewels, paintings, racehorses, and a couple of Magna Cartas.

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