Ironic Times

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PAGE TWO – APRIL 4 - 10, 2022
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PEOPLE
Trump Claims He Scored a
Hole-in-One at His Golf Club

His caddie won't talk, citing caddie-client privilege.
 
ENTERTAINMENT
After Slapping Incident, Oscar Ratings Shot Up
Next year's broadcast moving to pay-per-view.
FCC: 66 Viewers File
Complaints About Oscar Slap

Mostly, “Why'd you bleep it?”
 
BUSINESS
Maker of “Doomsday” Bunkers
Says Sales Have Increased 1000%

“I'm really optimistic,” he adds.
Amazon Warehouse Workers Vote to Unionize
CEO Andy Jassy, paid $212M in 2021, “regrets” cost of unionization will have to be passed along to customers.
CONSUMER NEWS
Survey: 3 in 4 Have Buyer's
Remorse After Online Purchase

That “Magic Penis Enhancer” wasn't all it was cracked up to be.
 
SCIENCE
Complete Human Genome Mapped for First Time
To genetecists' surprise, it looks just like downtown Philadelphia at night.
Hubble Telescope Captures Star 12.8 Billion Years Old
If it sees any further back in time “things will get scary,” says one astronomer.
 
HEALTH / MEDICINE
Report: We Eat Credit Card
Worth of Plastic Every Week

Experts' advice: don't eat credit cards.

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