Ironic Times

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PAGE THREE – JAN 29 - FEB 4, 2018
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TECHNOLOGY
Test Launch of Space X's Falcon Heavy Rocket Will Send Elon Musk's Tesla Into Space
In the meantime, he's driving a loaner.
 
MISCELLANEOUS
U.S. Drops to 8th Among “Best Countries Overall”
Still ahead of many shitholes.
British Group Disbands One Day After Report Reveals Men at Charity Event Groped, Harassed, Propositioned Women Hired as Servers
Closing its doors for good: The When She Says No She Means Maybe Association.
 
CORRECTION
 
We mistakenly reported that the Trump Administration was ending protected status for 800,000 Dreamers, 200,000 Salvadorans, 60,000 Haitians, and 50,000 Irish, all here illegally. The illegal Irish immigrants were not included in the termination orders. We apologize for any confusion.
FEATURE
How much money did the U.S. pharmaceutical industry spend on ads for prescription drugs in 2016?
  A ) $640,000
  B ) $6,400,000
  C ) $64,000,000
  D ) $640,000,000
  E ) $6,400,000,000
Hint: if you have trouble processing these numbers, we have a pill for that.
 
RELIGION
Evangelicals Give Trump “Mulligan” on Alleged Affair
Trump tweets thanks, starts another affair.
 
ODDS 'N' ENDS
Last Known U.S. Slave Ship Found
Trump administration will restore it, put it back into service.

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