| TECHNOLOGY |
 |
 Computer Takes on Human
Opponents in Poker Tournament
Loses its case, keyboard, hard drive,
everything but its underwear. |
|
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Engineers Warn: Internet Could
Reach Its Capacity in 8 Years
Once it does we'll be forced to face reality again. |
| |
| MISCELLANEOUS |
|
Man Imprisoned Wrongly for 36 Years
Given 1 Year of Free Burgers
Asks to be returned to prison. |
| |
| SPORTS |
|
Total Revenue From Mayweather-Pacquiao
Fight Greater Than GDP of 29 Countries
Mayweather can buy Madagascar and
have enough left over for Eritrea. |
|
 Due to Unrest, Baltimore Orioles
Play Game With No Fans Present
Win game, schedule eight more without fans. |
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| FEATURE |
 |
| What is this? |
 |
| A ) | Map showing
electoral college votes of the states. |
| B ) | Map showing
number of crazy people wandering around with guns. |
| C ) | Map showing
the location of 939 hate groups, compiled by the Southern
Poverty Law Center. |
| Hint: If you want it broken down into
categories, there's General Hate, Ku Klux Klan, Neo-Nazi,
White Nationalist, Racist Skinhead, Black Separatist,
Christian Identity and Neo-Confederate. |
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| |
| ODDS 'N' ENDS |
|
 Teen Solves Rubik's Cube in
Record-Smashing 5.25 Seconds
Previous record was three days. |
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