| KUDOS |
 |
 |
Glenn Beck
Honored
Topped every year-end
“Worst” list. |
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| |
| CONSUMER NEWS |
|
New Smart Bra Expands When
Body Temperature Rises
Hers, not yours. |
| |
| MISCELLANEOUS |
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Archeologists Discover Home
of One of Jesus’ Childhood Neighbors
Currently suffering eternal damnation for
giving Jesus a wedgie. |
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Study: Looks Matter More in
City
Less when on desert island. |
|
New Book Claims Warren Beatty
Bedded 12,775 Women
Based on interviews with 12,775 women. |
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| SPORTS |
|
 |
Fox Anchor
Brit Hume: Tiger Woods
Should Convert to
Christianity
And become a Republican. |
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| KIDZ KORNER |
Write
Your Own News Story
(fill in the blanks)
A new terrorist threat
has been growing in the
remote regions of _____,
where the corrupt central
government is so weak it
virtually does not exist
beyond the capital of
_____. In the mountainous
province of _____, local
warlords rule through a
tribal system marked by
drug trafficking and
extortion, making it an
ideal breeding ground for
______, a group
affiliated with _____,
which finds eager
recruits in ___, ____,
and _______. Due to
political instability,
rampant corruption and
widespread sympathy for
the ______, there is
virtually _____either the
central government or
their western allies can
do about it. |
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| CHESS |
|
 Norway
Teen Becomes Youngest to Top
World Chess Rankings
But he's turned down for
“Dancing With the
Stars.” |
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