| MISCELLANEOUS |
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Cheese Rendering of Trumbull's
“Declaration of Independence”
Recognized
As source of E.coli outbreak |
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| POLL |
|
Poll: More Prefer Obama
As Barbecue Guest
More prefer McCain as barbecue guest if
he brings the beer. |
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| SPORTS |
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Baseball: Mid-Season Report
So far, pitchers dominate as batters
struggle with inferior bats, no drugs. |
|
 Beijing:
Algae Threatens Olympic
Sailing Events
May have to be held on
land. |
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| FACTOID |
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Suicides Account for Half of
All Gun Deaths in U.S.
Fortunately, suicidal can now legally own
gun to defend themselves against
themselves. |
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| ENVIRONMENT |
|
 Prince
Charles Converts His
Aston Martin to Run on
Cheap Wine
Same thing for Camilla. |
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| TRAVEL |
|
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Tourism
Harming Machu Picchu, Say
Experts
They recommend seeing it
soon. |
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| THIS WEEK'S NEWS IN BRIEF |
|
Hands-Free, Fat-Free
Bear arms, bear market. |
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