| MISCELLANEOUS |
 |
 “Euros
Only” Signs Becoming
More Common in New York
American currency still
handy as used gum
wrapper. |
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Report: Thousands of Teens
Working as Unpaid Baggers in
Mexican Wal-Marts
Vying for opportunity to become underpaid cashiers. |
| |
| SPORTS |
|
 Report:
Roger Clemens’s
Wife Also Injected With Hormones as She
Prepped for Sports Illustrated Swimsuit
Photos
Another role model tainted. |
|
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|
|
Unused Patriots “Championship”
Gear Sent to Developing Countries
Kids in Ghana still think Chicago won last year's
game. |
|
 |
NFL Draft
Preview: Size, Youth Top
Teams' Wish Lists
Combination of both
“would be
ideal,” says one GM. |
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| FEATURE |
 |
| The White House has again
asserted that torture can
be used by our government
if there’s
“belief that an
attack is imminent.”
Whose belief that an
attack is imminent are
they talking about? |
| A ) | Curveball’s
belief, based on his own
imagination. |
| B ) | Another
detainee’s belief,
based on being tortured. |
| C ) | Bush’s
belief, based on voices
inside his head. |
| D ) | Cheney’s
belief, based on reports
from Satan. |
| E ) | Some
guy’s belief, who
just totally believes it. |
| Hint:
Curveball isn’t
always available,
evidence from people
we’re torturing
isn’t always
accurate, the voices
aren’t always
talking and Satan might
not want to warn us. |
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| |
| TECHNOLOGY |
|
Knee-Brace Harnesses Power of
Walking to Generate Electricity
Which powers backpack beer cooler. |
|
