| NEW PRODUCTS |
 |
 The
Toilet That Doubles as an
Aquarium!
You may remember this product as
“The Aquarium That Doubles
as a Toilet!” Well, it's
back, and at a much more
reasonable price. $400, at all
Pets 'n' Pipes (installation not
included). |
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| SPORTS |
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Dodgers Add
“All-You-Can-Eat”
Section to Bleachers
Will be kept separate from
“all-you-can-drink” section. |
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Rangers' Signing of Sosa One
More Repudiation of President Bush
Who traded him away in 1989. |
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Pillow Fight League
Playoffs Begin
Sport could be in next Olympics. |
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| KIDZ KORNER |
Vocabulary
Builders
chutzpah
n. (Yiddish)
nerve, demanding
something which one does
not deserve, as in,
“Attorney General
Gonzalez asked the
Senators to trust him
about the surveillance
program, based on his
record, a remarkable
display of ~.” |
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| FEATURE |
 |
| Edward Gibbon, in
Decline and Fall of the
Roman Empire, wrote: |
| A ) | Having
an empire is awesome! |
| B ) | To
conquer is good, to
dominate is way cool! |
| C ) | There
is nothing more contrary
to nature than to attempt
to hold in obedience
distant provinces. |
| Hint: think
“decline and fall of
...” |
|
| The country which has suspended habeas
corpus for the first time since it was
established in 1215 due to fear of a tiny
extremist group is known as: |
| A ) | the land of the free. |
| B ) | the home of the brave. |
| C ) | Palookaville. |
| Hint: Palookaville is not a country. |
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| MISCELLANEOUS |
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Study: Least Confident, Unhappiest
Students Do Best in Math
Conclusion: beware of cheerful CPAs. |
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Study Claims Snap Judgments Best
“Our snap judgment was they
weren't,” says study's director. |
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