| PICTURE OF THE
WEEK |
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 Senators
Wear Seersucker for
“Seersucker
Thursday”
Not shown: naked Senators
on “Clothing
Optional Friday.” |
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| ENTERTAINMENT |
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Nielsen to Include Internet,
iPods, Cellphones in TV Ratings
In test, last week's top 100 shows were
all videos of teenage boys mooning
camera. |
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Italian Directors Shoot
Entire Movie
On Cellphone Camera
“Upskirt Parade” opens in two
weeks. |
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| BUSINESS |
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Bill Gates to Step Down in 2008
Assuming he has enough
saved up for retirement. |
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| NEW PRODUCTS |
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Latest iPod
Aimed at AARP Crowd
Apple iPoop® stores up
to 5000 songs. |
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| HEALTH / MEDICINE |
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Report: Seventeen Glasses of
Beer a Day May Prevent Prostate Cancer
And standing up. |
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Study: Obesity Begins in the
Brain
Ends in the hips. |
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Report: America's Emergency
Rooms Nearing Capacity
Public urged to have serious medical
problems soon, or risk getting shut out. |
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| |
 Study:
Chimps Evolving Faster Than Humans
Eventually they'll pay to gawk at us. |
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Sex May Relieve Headaches
Finding renders excuse
“I've got a headache” worse
than useless. |
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| CORRECTION |
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| In a recent
story we reported that despite a
phone call from a Texas oil
executive to Karl Rove, the EPA
refused to alter a rule which
kept groundwater clean near oil
drilling sites. In fact, the EPA
changed the rule in response to
the complaint, allowing pollution
of the groundwater. We regret any
confusion caused by our mistake. |
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