| PEOPLE |
 |
 British Prime
Minister Appears on
"The Simpsons"
Tony Blair (left)
reiterates his belief to
Homer Simpson (right)
that Saddam Hussein posed
an imminent threat. |
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| ENTERTAINMENT |
|
"The Producers,"
Broadway Musical Based on Movie, to Be
Filmed
If successful, it will be adapted for
Broadway, and then made into a movie. |
|
Britney's Quickie Marriage
Only a Joke
She promises "bigger"
joke in about nine months. |
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| BUSINESS |
|
 U.S. Shifts From Tech-Based
to Security-Based Economy
Most Americans now employed
frisking other Americans. |
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| HEALTH / MEDICINE |
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New Study: Six or More Cups
of Coffee Daily Dramatically Cuts
Diabetes Risk
Andthere'sreallynothingonthedownsidebut
ateenyweenybitofjitterinessafterthefifthcup
whichactuallygoesawayagainaftertheseventh. |
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Maker of Penis
Enlargement Patch
Target of Class
Action Suit
Man (shown) claims he and
thousands like him have
suffered "undue
stress" and wants
$200 million in damages. |
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New Jersey to Legalize
Cloning
Opposition groups point to “a world
of Joe Piscopos.” |
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Elephants Heeding
Obesity Warnings
Many are shedding pounds
by eating more sensibly. |
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FDA Rejects Company’s Bid to
Market Silicone Breast Implants
Calls them incompetent boobs. |
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