| PEOPLE |
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GOOD NEWS:
QUEEN MUM
IMPROVING
She's back on
her feet after recent
snowboarding accident. |
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Celine Dion Theme Park in Early Planning
Stages
Diva's cloned frozen embryos will
eventually work there, save on labor costs. |
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| SPORTS |
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Commoner Captured in Luxury Box at
Basketball Game
Guilt or innocence will be determined at
trial by fire. |
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| WEATHER |
 |
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WINTER HITS HARD
Worst weather
anyone's seen
"since last
winter." |
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|
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Average Indoor Temperature Up
Slightly in 2000
Rises .1 degree to 70.4º. |
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| SCIENCE |
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Bush Opposed to Funding Fetal
Research
Thinks "we know enough about our
feet." |
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Prototype "Flying Carpet" Passes
First Test
Air Force pleased, but silent on potential use. |
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| HEALTH / MEDICINE |
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FDA: Nicotine Patches Habit-Forming
Agency recommends using cigarettes to wean
"patch addicts" away from them. |
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REMINDER
Don't forget to
change the century on
your atomic clock. |
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| RELIGION |
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Bush Administration to Attack
Water, Air Pollution with Sermons, Prayer
Faith-based effort will be rewarded by special thanks from White House. |
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| TRENDS |
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'My Real Baby' Robot Dolls to
Replace Real Babies by 2047
Slightly less trouble,
say experts. |
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