| PEOPLE |
 |
 Book: Trump
Clogged White House Toilets
With Documents
Ordered daily intelligence briefings
printed on softer paper. |
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| |
| BUSINESS |
|
Increased Use of VR Headsets Blamed
for Spike in Household Damage Claims
Frightening fire-breathing dragons turn out
to be that chandelier you got at IKEA. |
|
 Canadian Truck
Convoy Protest Blocks Border Crossing
Cuts off supply of Canadian imports like
maple syrup, Canadian bacon, comedy writers. |
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| |
| HEALTH / MEDICINE |
|
Study: Lifting Weights for
Just 3 Seconds a Day Can
Improve Muscle Strength
Try using a grocery sack filled with
several gallons of ice cream. |
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| SCIENCE |
|
 $10B James Webb
Telescope Sends Back First Image
General reaction: back to the drawing board. |
|
|
 France: Modern
Humans Moved Into Cave One
Year After Neanderthals Abandoned It
History's earliest known case of gentrification. |
|
|
 NASA: Mars
Rover Image of Reclining “Alien
Figure” Actually Just a Rock
But who put it there remains a mystery. |
|
|
Researchers Observe Chimps
Performing First Aid on
Themselves and Each Other
While other chimps spread misinformation. |
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