| PEOPLE |
 |
 QAnon Shaman
Pleads Guilty
“I'm one ashamed shaman,”
he tells judge. |
|
| |
| BUSINESS |
|
Report: Bitcoin Uses More
Electricity Than Many Countries
And bitcoin pays its electric bill
in bitcoins. |
|
August Jobs Report Disappointing,
But Many Positions Unfilled
Sign makers report equal sales of
“Help Wanted” and “I
Need a Job” signs. |
|
Amazon Recruiting Pot Smokers
to Solve Delivery Driver Shortage
Due to Screening Out Pot Smokers
Amends Prime 2-day delivery policy
to “whenever.” |
|
Apple Accused of Listening to
Users' Siri Questions Without
Their Knowledge
Charge leveled after Siri answers
“Yes” when asked, “Siri, does Apple
listen to my questions without my
knowledge?” |
|
| SCIENCE |
|
Astronauts Report New
Cracks in Aging Space Station
NASA hurriedly schedules mission
to send “that guy on TV who turns
a screen door into a boat.” |
|
Haze From Western Wildfires
Spoiled Perseid Meteor Shower
Next year, Perseid Meteor Shower
may shower a different planet. |
| |
| HEALTH / MEDICINE |
|
Purdue Pharma Dissolved in
$4.5 Billion Opioid Settlement
Disgraced Sackler family left with
mere $6.5 billion. |
|
Study: Toxic “Forever
Chemicals” Contaminate
Indoor Air at Dangerous Levels
Recommends everyone wear mask outside
house, hazmat suit inside. |
| |
| POLL |
|
65% of American Workers
Actively Searching for New Job
Something they can do at home, in their
underwear, stoned, when they feel like
it, for good pay. |
|
