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Ironic Times

 NO. 1015 “Expect the Ironic” MARCH 16 - 22, 2020 

Mar 9
Mar 23
 
  PANIC SETS IN: STORE
SHELVES EMPTY

Only item available: “Keep America Great” hats.
 
WORLD NEWS
Russia: New Constitutional
Amendment Allows Putin
To Rule Until 2036

Or whenever.
China, Trump Blame
Coronavirus Pandemic on
U.S. Army, Barack Obama

Respectively.
France: Thousands Ignore
Coronavirus Warnings, Gather
To Break World Record for
Most People Dressed as Smurfs
Later they set another world record: most people dressed as Smurfs in quarantine.
U. S. NEWS
Trump Calls National
Emergency

As his first act he's considering a “full pardon” of Michael Flynn.
Trump Touts Border Wall as
Defense Against Coronavirus

Will use most of newly authorized emergency $50 billion to complete it.
 
REMINDER
  Keep a diverse portfolio of canned food, toilet paper, and soap.
 
Google Diagnostic Website
Trump Promised Not Close to
Being Ready

However, a Google Doodle about it is in the works.
Administration to Lift
Water Pollution Controls

Public advised to chew their tap water thoroughly.
 
ENVIRONMENT
Boston Harbor Rose 9
Inches in 20th Century

Bunker Hill now Bunker Island.
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