| MISCELLANEOUS |
 |
 Researchers:
Octopuses on Ecstasy Become More Social
Ask your veterinarian if microdosing ecstasy
is right for your octopus. |
|
|
Study: “Lazy” Human Brains
Can't Choose if There Are
More Than 15 Options
That's why there are only 15 varieties of Cheerios. |
| |
| POLL |
|
The World Trusts Putin
More Than Trump
Trump trusts Putin more than Trump. |
| |
| ART |
|
 Banksy Artwork
Shreds Itself After Selling at Auction for $1.4 Million
Winning bidder furious at auction house's “No
Returns” policy. |
|
|
| FEATURE |
| |
Outgoing Message
of the Week
“Hello. You have reached the office of the
Federal Bureau of Investigation. None of
our agents are available to take your call.
If you are calling with a personal
recollection of being sexually abused or
assaulted by Brett Kavanaugh, please call
back next week after our investigation has
been concluded. Maybe we'll have lunch.
Do you like beer? ” |
|
| |
| RELIGION |
|
Einstein Calls Bible “Childish”
in Letter Expected to Get
$1 Million at Auction
He was writing to Santa Claus. |
| |
| ODDS 'N' ENDS |
|
 President Boards
Air Force One With Toilet Paper Stuck to His Shoe
Later tells press it was fake toilet paper put
there by George Soros. |
|
|
