Ironic Times

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PAGE TWO – MAR 26 - APR 1, 2018
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PEOPLE
Average Inflation- Adjusted Salary for Disney Employees Dropped 15% from 2000 to 2017, While CEO Robert Iger Pulled in $43.9 Million in 2016 Alone
2017 even better, says “happiest person in happiest place.”
 
ENTERTAINMENT
Disney Parks Drop Female
Auction Scene in “Pirates
of the Caribbean”

Replace it with pirate walking plank for sexual harassment.
 
BUSINESS
Toys 'R' Us Closing All Stores, Declares Bankruptcy
Blames decision to stop selling guns.
As Boomers Age, Home Health Worker 3rd Fastest-Growing Job
Right behind marijuana delivery man.
SCIENCE
New Theory: Collapsing Higgs
Bosons Could Destroy Universe
In 10139 Years

Not to worry: NASA reports large asteroid that can't be stopped will strike Earth in 2135.
Trump Proposes Cutting Funds
For Scientific Research

Plan hailed by the Flat Earth Society, Friends of Coal, American Adults Who Believe in Santa Claus, and Densa.
 
Wearable Scanner Images Your Brain While You Move
And it's a great conversation starter.
 
HEALTH / MEDICINE
Scientists Closer to Male Birth Control Pill
Final hurdle: making it resemble a Tic Tac.

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