| PEOPLE |
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 California: Richard
Nixon Library Reopens After Expensive Overhaul
Shown: honored guest Henry Kissinger proudly
recalls time President Nixon referred to him
as “that kike Kissinger.” |
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 Gingrich: There's
a “Big Trump”
And a “Little Trump”
And an “Infinitesimally Small Trump.” |
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| BUSINESS |
|
Wells Fargo CEO Steps Down,
Gets $134 Million in
Retirement Pay
Breaks down to a check for $67 sent to
each of his two million accounts. |
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 “On Hiatus”
– Ronald McDonald's Personal
Appearances Cancelled
Co-workers say he's been acting creepy. |
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| SCIENCE |
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Study: Universe Has 10 Times
More Galaxies Than Previously
Thought
Then again, you may be living in an alternate
universe where there are a hundred times more. |
| |
 China: Study
of Terracotta Army Reveals Western Influence
1500 Years Before Marco Polo
Their uniforms were cheap knockoffs of more
expensive Western designs. |
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| ENVIRONMENT |
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Human-Caused Climate Change
Blamed for Spike in Western
Wildfires
Smokey tweets, “Only you can prevent
global warming.” |
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| HEALTH / MEDICINE |
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Study: Coke, Pepsi Gave Millions
to Health Groups to Buy Their
Silence on Regulations
Now that truth is out, they want their money back. |
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