Ironic Times

Aug 1
PAGE THREE – AUGUST 8 - 14, 2016
page two

MISCELLANEOUS
Missouri: GOP Candidate for Governor Runs Ad Showing Him Firing Machine Gun
Unfortunately, firing at large crowd of supporters, making him an underdog.
Report: Donations Given as “Recurring Payment” on Trump Website Can't Be Cancelled
They're deducted from your savings account “in perpetuity” it says in tiny 2-point font at bottom of page.
 
TECHNOLOGY
Computers Being Trained to Spot Sarcasm
Still years away from recognizing disingenuousness.
 
SPORTS
IOC Adds Surfing, Skateboarding and Climbing to 2020 Olympics
Rejects poker, poetry and Pictionary.
Nike to Stop Making Golf Equipment, as Millennials Not Playing Golf
Although they love video golf, can't stop playing it.
Sinking in the polls, Trump is about to double down on Hillary, who he absolutely hates because:
A )she lies
B )she's corrupt
C )she's only maybe a 4
D )she reminds him of his first two wives
Hint: What's-Her-Name and What's-Her-Face.
 
FOOD
McDonald's Removes All
Artificial Preservatives and
Ingredients From McNuggets

Leaving nothing.
 
ODDS 'N' ENDS
Apple Changes Gun Emoji to a Water Pistol
Making it a bit harder to send anonymous online extortion threats.

FRONT PAGE
PAGE TWO
PAGE THREE
ARCHIVE
CONTACT
STORE
   Copyright 2016 Ironic Times