| PEOPLE |
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 Tuesday's NYSE Opening Bell
Rung by Miss Piggy
Friday's NYSE closing bell rung
by Oscar the Grouch. |
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| ENTERTAINMENT |
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YouTube to Produce Original
Content for Own Channel
Already auditioning thousands of cats. |
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ESPN Will Broadcast in China
Ping Pong Channel still looking for
cable home in U.S. |
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| BUSINESS |
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With Low Fuel Prices, Airlines
Reap Record Profits
Passengers benefit by once again getting
free peanuts. |
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Uber Providing Toys in Cars'
Back Seats to Keep Drunks
Occupied
Particularly drunk children. |
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 Zica Auto Company
Says It Will Change Its Name
Also the name of its best-selling
model, the Virus. |
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| SOCIAL MEDIA |
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Study: Time Wasted on Facebook
Could Be Costing Us Trillions in
Lost Productivity
Suggests switching to Twitter. |
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| SCIENCE |
 Expert: By 2050, Humans Will
Evolve to New Species and
Become “Digitally Immortal”
When you start to age and forget things, you get an upgrade. |
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| HEALTH / MEDICINE |
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Study: Millions of Obese Americans
Actually “Quite Healthy”
And surprisingly light on their feet. |
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| CORRECTION |
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| We reported that, in describing
her work at Goldman Sachs, Ted Cruz’s wife Heidi said
she was “helping people to achieve the American
dream.” In fact, she said she was “helping people
who have achieved the American dream.” We regret
any confusion caused by our mistake |
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