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Ironic Times

 NO. 727 “Expect the Ironic” SEPTEMBER 8 - 14, 2014 

Sep 1
Sep 15
COURT FINES BP $17 BILLION FOR “MAKING DECISIONS BASED ON MONEY, NOT SAFETY”
Which, as it happens, is BP's official motto.
 
WORLD NEWS
Al Qaeda Plans Expansion Into India
Hopes to increase brand recognition as ISIS moves into its territory, takes over its franchises.
 
POLL
Majority of Conservatives
Don't Like Soccer

Fear it leads to socialized medicine.
 
ALSO IN THE NEWS ...
Laser Tattoos to Replace Stick-on Fruit Labels
Prevents people from tearing off labels, then forgetting what kind of fruit it is.
U. S. NEWS
Report: Healthcare.gov Hacked
Intruders obtained affordable health insurance.
Minutemen Name Anti-Illegal Immigration Plan “Operation Normandy”
They'll station hundreds of Minutemen at border, just like at Normandy, when brave Nazis fought off illegal American troops.
 
REMINDER
  The enemy of my enemy's enemy is the friend of my enemy.
 
Experts: Fake Cellphone Towers
Spotted Around Country Not
Part of Any Network

Sophisticated signal interceptors able to monitor all our calls probably “the work of some kids,” they surmise.
 
TECHNOLOGY
New Software Developed That Detects When You're Not Paying Attention
Hello, anyone home?
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