| WORLD NEWS |
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UKRAINE: BILLIONAIRE CANDY MAGNATE
PETRO POROSHENKO WINS ELECTION
He promised a united country, a
revitalized economy, and free candy. |
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Thailand Undergoes 12th
Coup Since 1932
Country's constitution requires a coup every six years. |
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Europe Asks Google to Remove Embarrassing Links
If you want to know what your cousin's Parisian
girlfriend looks like in the shower, you'll have to
use Bing. |
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| ALSO IN THE NEWS |
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Report: Climate Change Could Sink Statue of Liberty
Suggests moving it to Kansas. |
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| U. S. NEWS |
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DOJ Charges Five Chinese Military
Officers With Hacking U.S. Companies
Fears they stole recipe for McDonald's
secret sauce, Colonel's 11 herbs and
spices. |
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After White House Intervenes, Bill
Intended to Increase Transparency in
Data Collections Changed Secretly
Changes also secret. |
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| REMINDER |
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If you're not on the kill list you
have no reason to worry about traveling
abroad. |
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Arkansas Gubernatorial Candidate
Turned Away at the Polls Due to
Voter ID Law He Supports
Loses by one vote. |
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| POLITICS |
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Same Republicans Outraged Over
Treatment of Veterans Filibustered
Against Better Health Care for
Veterans in February
Including treatment for memory loss. |
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