| NEW PRODUCTS |
 |
 New
Interactive Pajamas With Scannable
Codes Link to Online Bedtime Stories!
Wow! Now parents, freed from reading
to their kids, can go get a drink or have a
smoke and by the time they come back
the kids are in dreamland. 100% flammable
cotton. $29.95, at The Lousy Parent. |
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| SPORTS |
|
Pro Leagues Prepare for First
Gay Jackie Robinson
And first gay Branch Rickey. |
|
NCAA Names College Football
Playoff “College Football Playoff”
After rejecting “Football College Playoff,”
“College Playoff Football,” “Playoff
Football College” and “Football Playoff
College.” |
|
 Golf's
Controversial Ban on Belly Putter Begins
in 2016
More controversial ban on plaid pants
goes into effect in 2024. |
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 |
| Why in West, Texas were
two playgrounds, a middle school, a high school
and a retirement home all adjacent to a fertilizer
plant where there is a high risk of a massive
explosion, like the one which did occur, but
thankfully on a weekend when the kids weren’t
in school? |
| A ) | Just
real bad luck. |
| B ) | God
had some kind of revenge thing going on for reasons
known only to Him. |
| C ) | No
zoning laws in West, Texas, where folks don’t like
government telling them what they can and can’t
do, and where they can and can’t do it. |
| Hint: It ain’t bad luck, and
God had nothin’ to do with it. |
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| ODD'S 'N''E' NDS |
|
 Man Rejects
$2000 EBay Bid for Seemingly Unchanged
14-Year-Old McDonald's Burger
It's as delicious and nutritious as it was the
day he decided not to eat it. |
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