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DESPITE AUSTERITY, OLYMPICS
BEGIN WITH TYPICAL FANFARE
However, gold medals are actually bronze, silver
medals tin, bronze medals filled with chocolate. |
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| WORLD NEWS |
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In India, 90% of Marriages Still Arranged
For a better understanding of arranged
marriages, ask about it next time you call
tech support. |
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Iran's Atomic Energy Agency Plagued by
Malware That Plays AC/DC
With an embedded encrypted threat to unleash
Metallica. |
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| ALSO IN THE NEWS |
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 Romney Visits
Wailing Wall
Prays for success of GOP's voter
disqualification strategy. |
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| U. S. NEWS |
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Disastrous Drought Means Higher
Prices for Beef, Pork, Dairy
Could force Americans to consume less fat,
leading to fewer health problems, lower
medical costs and a booming economy. |
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Geithner Tells Congress He Found Out
About LIBOR Rate Fixing in 2008
Says he immediately told Joe Paterno and left
it at that. |
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| REMINDER |
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Ask yourself: are your offshore
accounts better off now than they were four
years ago? |
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CBO: Due to Supreme Court Ruling,
Three Million More Will Be Uninsured
None of them judges. |
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WellPoint, Other Insurers
Now Outsourcing Nursing
Jobs to India, Philippines
You'll have to scream a little louder when your i.v. slips out. |
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| POLITICS |
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Tampa Looks Forward to Jobs
Generated by GOP Convention
In August
Strip clubs already hiring. |
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