| PEOPLE |
 |
Carla Bruni
Seen in New York
With some French guy. |
|
 |
|
|
 Sarah
Palin Addresses S&M Convention
Says McCain “kinkier than he looks.” |
|
| |
| BUSINESS |
|
U.S. Selling Citigroup Shares
To eager investors, banking on next
government bailout. |
|
$700 Billion of Junk Bond Debt Coming Due in 2012
As predicted in Mayan Calendar. |
|
 Housing
Market Rebound Begins
It may take some time before
it reaches your neighborhood. |
|
|
| SCIENCE |
|
Copernicum Named 112th
Element in Periodic Table
Announcement hailed by makers of large
periodic table wall charts. |
|
Toads Leave Area 5 Days
Before Earthquakes
If you see toads leaving town, call your
insurance agent. |
|
Hadron Collider Operational,
Proton Beams Smash Together
Parallel universe created, possibly this
one. |
|
 Door
to Afterlife Discovered
in Egypt
Key still missing. |
|
| |
| HEALTH / MEDICINE |
|
Study: Junk Food as Addictive
as Cocaine, Heroin
Concurrent study finds cocaine, heroin as
addictive as junk food. |
|
Study: We're Happier When We
Have More Than Next Guy
More likely to go berserk when we don't. |
|
