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Ironic Times

 NO. 459 “Expect the Ironic” JUNE 29 - JULY 5, 2009 

June 22
July 6
 
AHMADINEJAD CELEBRATES
REELECTION, THANKS ALLAH

For rigging the election.
 
WORLD NEWS
U.S. Warships Tracking Suspicious North Korean Vessel
May be transporting nuclear device or thousands of pirated Yosemite Sam cartoons.
 
POLL
Gallup Poll: Infidelity Edges
Out Polygamy Atop List of
Modern Moral Sins

When added to list, however, polygamous infidelity beats everything.
 
ALSO IN THE NEWS
Maria Sharapova Loses at Wimbledon
TV ratings plummet.
U. S. NEWS
Obama Signs Family Smoking and Tobacco Control Act
Also known as Nicorette and Nicoderm Windfall Act.
New Nixon Tapes: Nixon, Billy Graham Make Anti-Semitic Remarks
National Archives still searching for one tape on which Nixon doesn't make anti-Semitic remarks.
 
REMINDER
  This is the Chinese Century.
 
NYC Drivers Voted Angriest,
Most Aggressive

Celebrate victory by roughing up police, burning taxicabs.
  Paper: NSA Continues to Monitor Your Phone Calls, E-Mails, Tweets
So you don't have to.
 
POLITICS
Ensign, Sanford Lead Pack of 2012 GOP Hopefuls
According to fairly recent press release.
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