Ironic Times

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PAGE THREE – APRIL 20 - 26, 2009
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MISCELLANEOUS
Post Office Issues “Simpsons” Stamps
American Society for the Preservation of Morality and Propriety has a cow.
Study: U.S. Numb to Mass Violence
If death toll isn't in double figures we change channel.
Electricity Wasted by 62 Trillion
Junk E-Mails Could Power
2 Million Homes

However, many may not be willing to give up their regular reminders of cheap meds, knockoff Rolexes and penile extensions.
 
ENVIRONMENT
EPA: Greenhouse Gas Emissions Unhealthful
Even to Republicans.
 
SPORTS
John Madden Announces Retirement
Computer version will make announcement in Madden '10.
FEATURE
In one month, March of 2003, CIA interrogators waterboarded Khalid Sheikh Mohammed:
  A ) 3 times
  B ) 31 times
  C ) 183 times
Hint: We don't torture.
 
TRAVEL
United Airlines to Charge “Seatmates of Size” for Two Seats
Or $10 per pound over three hundred pounds, whichever is greater.
 
HISTORY
New Analysis of Titanic: Yanks Pushed Past Brits to Save Selves
Displaying classic American traits of fierce competitiveness, rugged individualism.

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