Ironic Times

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PAGE TWO – SEPTEMBER 15 - 21, 2008
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ENTERTAINMENT
Madonna Tour Continues Selling Out
With help from steep AARP discount.
 
MEDIA
Study: Half of Liquor Advertising Aimed at Young
In effort to steer them away from drugs.
 
BUSINESS
Report: Oil Prices Manipulated By Speculators
Speculators call report speculation.
Ford Wants to Cut 4,200 Jobs
And go into a different business.
 
PUBLISHING
Esquire Unveils First “E Ink” Cover
Hopes gimmick lures back readers who switched to Playboy in 1955.
SCIENCE
Study Finds Men Attracted to Women Who Look Like Their Mothers
And work like their fathers.
Biologists on Verge of Creating Life From Non-Living Matter
Promises future where cans, bottles can be recycled as dogs, cats.
Large Hadron Collider Solves Mystery of Universe
Scientists move on to other projects.
 
HEALTH / MEDICINE
Study: Each Daily Cup of Coffee Cuts Cirrhosis of the Liver Risk 22%
If too wired on caffeine, take edge off with a few stiff drinks.
 
WHERE ARE THEY NOW?
Remember Michael Phelps? He was the guy at the Olympics who won all those medals. Today, he's back home in Baltimore, unemployed, but considering an offer from the fledgling Pro Swimming League. Meanwhile, like everyone else, he's "mostly watching football."

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